You didn't even know what the chechen was, I doubt you could have picked it for tone when you didn't know what it was, but whatever, you're obviously so stubborn that you'll do this anyway. My honest opinion is that you've got a good start base of skill, just you need to practise more before you start selling, because by your own admission (see quote in a second) you don't have the skills yet:
"Overall, I think it may be time to stop with this body. There's a point when you're just making things worse if you keep tinkering with it, and I think I'm there. I know there's a way around the mistakes I've made, I just don't have the skill or knowledge to do it right now. "
I really don't care if you succeed or not, I'm not emotional about this at all, I'm just calling it how I see it. I'd only care about you succeeding or whatever if I was the person who bought the body from you, which thankfully I'm not. To turn me into some symbolic representation of the way you feel about your ex-wife who didn't love you enough because I don't just say "YOU GO MAN, SELL IT A MILLION TIMES, YOU ROCK" is a bit unreasonable. Maybe you should ask a refund from whatever therapist was previously helping you through that, because it obviously didn't work.