GregSP

That's exactly right. It looks good because it doesn't accept stain evenly. A gel stain might give better results for what the OP wants than a dye. Or a washcoat might help too.

That is mostly correct. When you boil it down, blotchiness is caused by the stain penetrating the wood unevenly. One cause (not the only cause) is that the same piece of wood has different densities, so the stain doesn't soak in at the same rate. A washcoat will help prevent deep penetration but still leave the surface pourous enough to accept stain. The trade off is that the color will be lighter. Again, with maple the different densities are what give you figure. So you probably wouldn't want to use a washcoat with figured maple because you'll be masking the beauty of the wood. Alder is generally unspectacular a washcoat it might a solution. A good wet coat of stain and letting it soak in a little bit longer might work too.

Alder is blotchy by nature. One thing you can do is let the stain soak in for a little longer before you wipe it off. That will allow it to soak in more evenly. Another thing is to use a washcoat. Perhaps a better choice would be to use a gel stain. Maple is also blotchy by nature. But figure is the same phenomenon as blotchy so a water based stain that brings out the figure can be desirable in same cases.

You don't need lemon oil. They put the lemon scent in to make it appeal to housewives. Nothing wrong with that, but it is has no special wood treating properties. Fretboards sometimes need cleaning, but they seldom need oiling. Regular mineral oil they sell at the grocery store for cutting boards is fine for that. You'll need a tiny amount every few years, if that often.

This is anecdotal, but I have a friend and former guitar teacher who is also studio musician and record producer, he has the best ears of anyone I've ever known personally. He loves Buzz Feiten tuning and had all his guitars updated.

Newbie here... ...All tung oil isn't tung oil. By that I mean just because it says tung oil on the can, doesn't mean it is tung oil. For example, the MinWax tung oil you get at Home Depot is tung oil mixed with varnish. Nothing wrong with that necessarily, just pointing out that there are lot of products that say they are tung oil, but are something different than what you expect. Various other tung oils may contain blends of other oils and/or varnish. The advantage of the Minwax tung oil over real tung oil is that the Minwax hardens up in a reasonable amount of time. 100% tung oil takes a long, long time. Usually if a product is pure tung oil they will proudly mark that fact on the can. If it is a blend, then you have to play detective and read the ingredients. The reason why I mention all this is because if someone mentions tung oil, they might be talking about a specific product that may or may not be 100% tung oil, so the question is a little more complicated that it seems at first. I believe that Warmoth doesn't warranty bodies or necks finished with tung oil for this reason, there are simply too many products out there claiming to be tung oil for them to verify each one of them. So they have a blanket no tung oil policy. Tru-oil is polymerized tung oil. Similar in feel and application, but dries harder and faster.